Alexis Handelman | Hal Milton | Alex Meraud By Craig Smith
ALEXIS HANDELMAN One of Alexis Handelman’s childhood memories is of going to a friend’s house after school. “It was so different,” she said. “Our kitchen had a red ceiling and gray walls, and theirs was painted simply white.” The Handelman house was alive with music, emigres and laughter. Her father was a Jewish Russian immigrant who played Gypsy mandolin and “gleaned so much joy out of life and people.” He was playful, impish and fearless. Alexis’s mother was fashionable and charming, and encouraged her dance lessons. She took Alexis and her sister to plays and ballets, but, “I’m really Max’s daughter.”
Alexis was born and raised in the Richmond district in San Francisco. She left at 18 to attend Boston University and then the Boston Conservatory of Music, majoring in musical theater. She was a dancer at heart, and as a child, took lessons at SF Ballet and also got to dance with the NYC Ballet as a fairy in their initial production of a Midsummer Night’s Dream, when they came West.
After college there was a two year move to Davis (a romantic fling that became her marriage), and an eventual move to SF for eight years. Those years saw a lot of travel – she was a clothing buyer for a women’s specialty store, driving lessons (finally!) an awakened interest in baking, cooking and a pregnancy.
Following the artisan coffee trend of the 80s, Denise Towhey was opening the Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Company, and wanted her friend Alexis to come work for her. “What I really want to do is bake,” said Alexis. Denise told her that was perfect. She could bake and be a barista.
Word got out that Alexis could indeed bake, and her goods were soon being sold in Vallergas Markets and Oakville Grocery, but the Napa Farmers Market was where she knew she had a retail audience. When Luigi’s Pizzeria on Third Street closed and put its equipment up for auction, Alexis approached them and told them she would take it all. She ended up leasing the space, and Alexis Baking Company, known as ABC Bakery to thousands of Napa residents and visitors, was born.
Knowing it would take savory food along with baked goods to make the rent, Alexis was able to attract like-minded people who wanted to produce quality products with quality ingredients. At first it was an “all girls’ club” – eventually morphing into a wholly integrated group of talented and dedicated individuals.
After 35 years in the business – 30 of them on Third Street, ABC closed among the difficulties of COVID and a changing economic climate.
Alexis loves retirement. “I have space to breathe. I get to cook and bake at leisure for people I love. I get the freedom to do as I wish with no constraints. I’m living in a very rich period.”
HAL MILTON
Hal Milton, now 91 years old, has been an educator, athletic coach, Realtor, Rolfer, Unity Minister and Chaplain to the Napa Police Department. He published his second book, “Wising Up, Life Without Regrets,” 20 years ago. Interviewed by the Napa Valley Register upon the book’s release, Hal stressed that life “is more than achievement, financial success and getting more, which seems to be the preoccupation of most people in their middle years.” He intended the book for that age group, but a woman reader in her eighties contacted him and thanked him for all she’d learned from him.
His first book was based on a workshop he developed to help people who wanted to sing, but were frozen with stage fright. Drawing on his knowledge of sports, business, spirituality and entertainment, he taught them how to overcome that fear. At the end of the weekend retreat, participants took to the stage and sang. “Going Public,” a how-to manual for developing personal charisma, published in 1995, was born of those workshops.
Hal was born in Detroit and family moved to LA, when he was in his early teens. After a year in junior college, he joined the Navy. Told he was too small to play football, he tried out for the team anyway, and spent his two years in the military playing football for the Navy.
He did his undergraduate work at UCSB, then got a master’s degree in Physiology of Exercise from UCLA. He coached high school football for a few years, but it became increasingly difficult to support a family with three kids on a coach’s salary, so he changed to real estate. He attended a seminar that was supposed to make him a better sales person, but it had a much more profound, spiritual impact. A changed man as a result of it, he entered therapy, attended Buddhist sanghas, and got into Rolfing (a type of bodywork that involves manipulating the body’s connective tissues).
In 1981, he met Sonya Green, also a Rolfer, at a spiritual conference in LA. They reconnected a year later at a retreat in Boulder, and have been together since.
The couple became Unity ministers, which lead them to Missouri and then Knoxville, Tennessee. After that, they moved to Napa, and spent five years serving as ministers of the Unity church here.
Church pulpit work was not for Hal. He has always done outreach, including a lot of immigration work. “His genius is helping people bring out their authentic, true selves,” said Sonya. “He sees what people need, and makes them feel safe.”
Hal suffered the first of two strokes in 2014, and today has dementia. Sonya sat by his side during the interview for this article, helping him remember events and timelines. Still, he goes to the gym three days a week. He is as gracious and humble now as he has ever been. If you see him, you’ll have to reintroduce yourself. He will likely take your hand in both of his, look you in the eye and ask you to remind him how he knows you. As you speak, you will know that he is listening deeply, and you will feel his love.
ALEX MERAUD Alexandra (Alex) Meraud has crammed a lot into her 38 years on the planet. She’s a psychotherapist, a trained yoga instructor, and the lead singer in a band. She even did a stint a florist assistant. If something peaks her interest, she’s all in.
Born in Hollywood, Alex went to high school in Torrance. She lived 10-15
minutes from the beach, and spent a lot of time walking along the ocean with her mom, with whom she is very close. She moved north for college, and got a bachelor’s degree in Psychology at San Francisco State. Two counseling jobs, one at an eating disorder rehab and the other working with emotionally disturbed juveniles, confirmed for her that she wanted to continue as a therapist. Alex moved back to the LA area and attended Antioch University for her Masters in clinical psychology. After that, she said she was kind of lost.
“What do I do now? I’ve always been a student.” Mom had already moved to Napa, so Alex followed her. Now came the big challenge – to be a therapist in California, you need to complete 3,000 hours of internship work, and then test for certification. After a couple of years, she finished the internship work and was ready to take the test for certification. That presented a new challenge.
“I’m pretty sure I have some undiagnosed learning disorder, or at least test anxiety,” said Alex. So, she took a month off, went to Bali, and became a yoga instructor. “Like therapy wasn’t enough,” she said with a smile. After returning to Napa, Alex took and aced the test the first time she took it, which is unusual in that field.
The yoga was more than just a fun vacation fluke. She’s had back problems for years, so she took a yoga class in college to manage her pain. She practices yoga but also teaches poses to others if she thinks it will help. “I will sometimes show a client or friend a pose that can be used to relieve depression or anxiety. I do a lot of breath work too, and am happy to share that as well.”
Alex occasionally does something different, just to mix things up. She worked as a therapist at the CIA. She spent time assisting a florist. A few years ago, the cover band Trick Play asked her to join as lead singer. Her claim to fame: “We’ve played two gigs at the Petaluma Pumpkin Festival. It’s strictly for fun.”
For a few years, Alex wasn’t dating anyone, and her therapist pointed out to her that she seemed to be putting off having fun. “The therapist said, ‘If you want to go camping, go camping. You don’t have to wait for some guy.’” This was sage advice, and Alex told a group of friends that she was going camping. “Can I come, too?” asked one of the men. “That wasn’t what I had in mind at all,” Alex said with a laugh. Still, she agreed he could join her. They’ve now been dating for over a year.
“I love being in Napa,” she said. “I think it’s beautiful and am so grateful. I love my job and love my life.”
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